Six years ago, today, Jasper was born.
Six years ago, and I remember it so well.
I remember the very moment the doctor laid him on my chest, fresh and new, warm and soft. I remember looking at him, observing him, unable to take my eyes off of his perfect little face, his thick matte of black hair, and his hands clenched in tiny determined fists. I felt immense adoration for this new person that God had blessed our family with. I was in love.
I’ve been challenged over the course of these past several weeks of Advent to consider what, or whom, I adore. What thing, or what person, holds my heart? Or better yet, what thing or person, is king of my heart? Who do I adore…who do I worship?
This is week four of Advent…come, let us adore him.
“The days are coming,” declares the Lord, “when I will raise up to David a righteous Branch, a King who will reign wisely and do what is just and right in the land. In his days Judah will be saved and Israel will live in safety. This is the name by which he will be called: The Lord Our Righteousness.” Jeremiah 23:5-6
When the Magi came to King Herod and inquired about “the one who has been born king of the Jews?” (Matthew 2:2), Herod was “disturbed”.
King Herod’s actions after his initial disturbance were truly horrific. He ordered that all boys who were two years old or younger in Bethlehem and its vicinity be put to death. His fierce anger and jealousy wreaked devastation and destruction on the lives of innocent families and communities.
I am not a fan of King Herod. I imagine you are not, either. He is the villain in the Christmas story.
And yet, I wonder how often I behave just like him. I don’t throw out murderous plots or meet out acts of revenge, but I do struggle to relinquish the throne over my life.
“Where is the true King?” That question is the most disturbing question possible to a human heart, since we want at all costs to remain on the throne of our own lives. – Hidden Christmas, by Timothy Keller
This question has troubled me. As a child, I often pictured myself as Mary in the grand drama of the Christmas story, but when I stop and try to answer this question, “Where is the King?” I realize that, more often than not, I am Herod.
I struggle to give God everything.
I struggle to adore him without reservation.
There is always that little something that keeps me from fully surrendering.
It is a battle.
Yet, to truly adore God is to let go of the throne of my life.
And this is a daily act of surrender.
“O come let us adore him.”
To adore him is to be fully devoted to him.
Even now, when I look at Jasper, there is a love – inexplicable – that fills every nook and cranny of my heart. I adore that little boy of mine.
But there is a King who does not beg, demand or force my affections and adoration. He doesn’t push his way onto the throne of my life. He simply waits.
To forfeit my throne to this King only give my heart a greater capacity to love…to forgive…to pour out freely…to worship and adore the true King.
He is the King – The Lord Our Righteousness – who holds my heart in the palm of his hands.
He is the King – Emmanuel, God with us – who abides with me in every circumstance.
He is the King – Christ the Lord – who reigns over my life with wisdom and peace.
And I adore Him.
“For He alone is worthy,
For He alone is worthy,
For He alone is worthy,
Christ, the Lord.”
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