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Friday’s Free Advice

Mar 5th, 2010 by Amy

Sitting here at my computer this morning, I do so with a very squirmy three-year-old.  Jackson has decided that simply being in the same room with me is not enough.  He needs to be pressed up, hands and feet on my waist and in my face kind of close to me.  Currently, he is leaning over my shoulder with his arms squeezing my neck.  This, of course, is not very conducive to typing, but who can resist “Mama, I wanna sit wiff you?”  My heart melts. 

 

Moments like this I try hard to capture and freeze in my mind like a photograph.  Moms who have gone before me have warned, time and time again, that this season will be gone in a flash.  How true.  Just last night I was looking at pictures taken at a photo shoot right after Sydney was born almost seven years ago.  Tiny hands and curled up toes, her mouth opening up with a yawn (or maybe she was rooting around for her milk – she sure loved mealtime).  Precious memories, evidence of God’s miraculous answer to a long awaited prayer. 

 

And so today, rather than fill a page with deep thoughts, funny stories, and motherly musings, I’m going to put my computer away for a while and sit with my son.  I’m going to cherish this human jungle gym feeling, tuck it away in my heart, and hold it like a worn black and white photo before it is lost forever.  With my face cupped in the sticky hands of my son as he whispers, “Mama, I love you,” I realize this is my moment to let time stand still…and I’m going to do just that.

 

Friday’s Free Advice: If it can wait until later, or even tomorrow, let it go and embrace the time you have with the ones you love…especially if their bodies are dangling from your shoulders with their cheeks mashed against yours.

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Posted in Fun Stuff, Motherhood | No Comments »

Invisible

Mar 3rd, 2010 by Amy

If you had a superpower what would it be?  I think mine might be invisibility.  Maybe it’s because of my reserved temperament, or what feels like years of dust accumulating on me as I sit on a shelf waiting for my moment to do something great for God.  Maybe it has nothing to do with either of these.  Yet, for whatever reason, I often times feel…invisible. 

 

I think Joseph – from the Bible, son of Jacob, sold into slavery, thrust into prison, second-in-command in Egypt Joseph – might have felt very much the same way I have at one time or another.  He had these incredible God-given dreams that placed him in a position of authority and prestige, only to be thrown down into a pit, bartered off by his brothers to endure years of heartache and disappointment.  It took tragedy after tragedy in his life for him to eventually see his dreams fulfilled.  He had to become invisible before God could raise him up to the most visible position in the land of Egypt.

 

I was looking at a seed the other day.  There was, with it, a picture of the beautiful flower that this seed was destined to become.  As I took a closer look at the small indescript object, I began to envision the end result.  All of the potential, color, texture and fragrance of this plant was right there in my hand – in the form of a tiny seed.  However, until it is actually placed into the ground, covered up with dirt, invisible and out of sight, it will never become the magnificent flower it was intended to be.

 

And even after that there is still a great deal of cultivation and patience needed before the results start poking through the soil.  Roots must grow deep and strong, expanding out and down under the ground to give the plant a firm foundation.  Without them the beautiful flower-to-be would be swept away when once the first storm were to hit its tender buds.  In time, in God’s time, tiny sprouts will protrude up through the grimy dirt, poking their heads out into the sunshine.  And eventually, the intended beauty of the flower will blossom and bloom: a gift to the world.

 

I believe, like with the seed and the flower, it is actually in those invisible moments – waiting for that dream, hope, promise to be fulfilled – that God is doing, by far, his greatest work.  It may appear as though, after God dropped a dream or a promise into your heart, he then mysteriously vanished.  It may feel close to abandonment.  Ever wonder why God does that?  I have.  What is the point of getting our hopes up, only to turn his back (seemingly) on us?  Oswald Chamber’s wrote: “Whenever God gives a vision to a saint, He puts him, as it were, in the shadow of His hand, and the saint’s duty is to be still and listen.  When God gives a vision and darkness follows, wait.  God will make you in accordance with the vision He has given if you will wait His time.”  God’s silence is not his abandonment.  He has not forgotten you, or the dreams he birthed inside you, simply because he has left you in complete darkness.  No.  He has, in fact, planted you deep in the soil, covered you up, made you invisible to all the world so that one day he may make you visible in accordance to his plan.

 

What can we learn in the wait?  Spiritual discipline, trust, brokenness and complete surrender.  We learn how to wait – how to be still and know that he is God.  We discover our weaknesses, those places in our hearts that are most vulnerable to pride, failure and self-sufficiency. 

 

How do we handle the wait?  We abide in Him. 

 

Psalm 91:1

“He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High, shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.”

 

Abide means “to remain, continue, stay; to continue in a particular attitude or relationship.”  We stick with God.  And while we are drawing closer to him and resting in him, we are also in his shadow – covered up and hidden away.

             

What can we receive from the wait?  God’s plan made perfect in us and through us.  That’s it.  The chiseling away of our selves and our pre-conceived ideas of what these life dreams are supposed to look like.  Joseph caught a glimpse of his future, and it was phenomenal.  I’m sure his heart started racing as he visualized the greatness and awe of his destiny.  It must have surely blown him away.  But he wasn’t ready for the destiny, and it took a few pits, being forgotten and a couple thousand moments of God’s silence for such a dream as this to be realized.  It didn’t come easy.  And neither will mine, or yours. 

 

During the wait God is refining us – chipping away self and pride.  He is humbling us in order to raise us up.  He is causing us to be invisible so that he can then make himself visible through us.

 

“When you are in that season – that dark, empty pit of your life – there is nothing more precious to God.” – Linda Noah (Communication/Group Life Pastor at Portland Christian Center)

 

As we wait through the pain, through the disappointments, through the long and heavy nights, we are precious to God.  How sweet is that?  He hasn’t forgotten us.  He hasn’t abandoned us.  He hasn’t walked away or turned his back, although it may feel that way.  He hasn’t let us go.  He is still holding on tightly to us.  In fact, he is holding us in the palm of his hands.  He is hiding us in the shadow of his wings.  We may be invisible to the world, but we are not invisible to Him.  He sees us.

 

And one day, when our roots are strong and our buds have blossomed, we will open our eyes, look up and feel the warmth of sunlight on our faces.  We will relish in the moment of seeing and being seen.  No longer invisible, no longer dusty or cast off into a pit, but fully alive and bearing fruit.  Fulfilling the destiny God has chosen for us, our dreams awakened and in full bloom.

 

So as we wait invisible, let us not waste time sinking into invisibility.   Rather, may we be hard at work during the wait, and never for a moment think that God’s hand has withdrawn from us, or that his eye has wandered.  We are destined for His greatness – His visibility through us.

Posted in Faith, Ministry | 6 Comments »

Not My Usual Way & Not The Typical Post

Mar 1st, 2010 by Amy

I’m racing the clock to get something posted this morning.  This is not my usual way of operating.  I like to be organized, thorough and have my posts for the next week written on Friday.  It saves me time, and still allows me to stay on top of things. 

 

I had written something for today, but decided at the last minute to pull it.  It wasn’t bad.  There was nothing wrong with it either.  It just didn’t feel right.  At least, it didn’t feel right for today.  So, here I am, we’re headed into mid-morning, and I’ve got nothin’. 

 

Well, maybe not nothin’.  There is one little somethin’ on my heart right now.   (Please excuse the typos  as this is coming straight from my heart to this page – unedited.)

 

One word. 

 

Perseverance. 

 

You know, it would seem as though life is determined to chew us up and spit us out sometimes.  We go from one pit to another pit.  Sometimes it’s our circumstances that push us over the edge and we’re down, gasping for breath.  Other times someone comes along and shoves us into a very dark place.  There are some holes we dig ourselves into, and then we have to struggle and fight to dig ourselves back out again.  In those weak and empty spaces of our lives it becomes increasingly tempting to give up.  We want to just throw in the towel and say, “I quit!”  Have you ever been there?  Oh my word, I know I have.  Many times I have found myself pressed in beyond what I feel I am capable of handling, and I’ve wanted to let go.  Release my grip and fall back into the hole of my sorrow.  That, my friends, is a very lonely, sad and broken place to be.

 

What keeps me from giving in to the flesh in me that wants to throw up my hands and surrender to the pit that has tried so hard to enslave me?  What keeps the soul from shriveling up and dying away?  What holds me steady, when everything else is falling apart?  Perseverance.  Tenacity.  Clinging to God and not the rope of my own making.  Clinging to the intricate strands of God’s truth.  Trusting in the Lord, and lifting up sacrifices of thanksgiving when I don’t necessarily see anything around me to be thankful for.  Grounding myself in the Word of God that gives me the unction to keep pressing on, keep moving forward and keep going deeper spiritually rather than deeper into the pit.  Perseverance is not about willing myself to just get through it, or relying on my own strength.  Perseverance is charging forward in God’s strength when I’m so weak and broken I can’t see the light of day.   

 

Romans 5:3-5

Not only so, be we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.  And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

 

Perseverance produces character (and I long to be a woman of integrity, raising children with godly character), and character produces hope (without hope, what else is there?).  We keep moving forward.  We keep pressing on.  Even in our weakest moment, by simply leaning on God – or perhaps falling to pieces in his arms – we are persevering.  We will not let go, and we will not give up.

 

My one thought for today: Perseverance!

(Inspired by the teaching of Linda Noah at a women’s retreat I attended this past weekend.)

Posted in Faith, Grace | 4 Comments »

Friday’s Free Advice

Feb 26th, 2010 by Amy

I find it somewhat ironic (and perhaps a teeny bit frightening) that I decided to make Friday my big day for dishing out advice, seeing that I am not an authority or leading expert on anything (except for my own personal dysfunction).  I haven’t lived long enough nor have I collected nearly enough life experiences to fill your weeks with deep insights and ”you ought to’s”.  Quite honestly, I feel a little pretentious as I sit here conjuring up this week’s free advice, scratching my head as to what possessed me to declare that Friday’s were going to be my “free advice” days in the first place.  What was I thinking?  Yet, I got this snowball started, so I guess I need to continue rolling away until I make it down the mountain (not even sure if that makes sense).

 

Today’s “free advice”:  Do a little every day (housecleaning, that is). 

 

Because I “have it all together” and feel compelled to pass on these snippits of wisdom and knowledge, I have also come to realize that much of what I am advising is what I am personally feeling challenged to do, practice, and change in my own life.  Take, for example, housecleaning.  There was a time, in the not-so-distant past, when I practiced the art of doing a little cleaning throughout the week so that by the end of the week I wasn’t facing 1550 square feet of dirt, grime and laundry.  I was doing pretty well for a while, and then I started adding more to my life (another child included in that), and suddenly found myself pushing off the cleaning – procrastinating myself into a giant, filthy mess.

 

Last Saturday I literally spent the entire day cleaning, scrubbing, cooking, grocery shopping, vacuuming and washing multiple loads of laundry (which subsequently needed to be folded afterwards).  I was exhausted and ready to hit the hay by 7pm.  I wanted to kick myself for waiting to do it all in one day.  I realized I needed to start going back to what has worked for me in the past: taking on a little bit each day.

 

It kind of looks like this:

 

Monday – dusting and vacuuming

Tuesday – laundering clothes and vacuuming

Wednesday – laundering towels and vacuuming

Thursday – free day (which I desperately need) and, of course, vacuuming

Friday – bathrooms, laundering of washrags and kitchen towels and vacuuming

Saturday – groceries, laundering clothes and bed linens, kitchen, wash hardwood floors…and vacuuming

 

(As you can see, vacuuming is a daily chore at my house…and desperately needed.)

 

By breaking it up throughout the week I find that I am not so weary.  Some days are easier than others, but at least I’m not taking it all on in one day…that’s just unnecessary, especially with three young children running around.

 

What about you?  Have you tapped in to your inner housecleaning diva?  Do you have any tricks of the trade?  Please feel free to share your pearls of wisdom with the rest of us!

Posted in Fun Stuff | No Comments »

More Thoughts On Being Blessed

Feb 24th, 2010 by Amy

2 Corinthians 9:15

“Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift!”

 

A few months ago, I hammered out my thoughts on being blessed.  “What does it mean to be blessed?” was my question.  Revisiting the post, a wave of “writer’s remorse” washed over me.  The thought seemed unfinished, but I needed more time to process and more time in God’s word.  This is what I have since discovered in my quest to understand God’s blessing: 

 

There are different kinds of blessings.  In this post, I am going to touch on the following:  Covenantal blessing, material and spiritual blessing, the blessedness of Christ and grace, and the cup of blessing. 

 

On the Covenant Blessing:

 

The covenant blessing signified God’s promise and favor over His people (Deuteronomy 28:1-14).  This favor that God extended to His people was evidence of His graciousness towards them – a sign of His endless mercy and goodness.  At the same time, God’s blessings were oftentimes contingent upon man’s obedience to His laws as were His cursings a result of disobedience (Deuteronomy 30:15-20). 

 

There is also the covenant blessing God made to Abraham in Genesis:

 

Genesis 15:5

And He took him outside and said: “Now look toward the heavens, and count the stars, if you are able to count them.”  And He said to him, “So shall your offspring be.”

 

God made a pact with Abraham, being nearly one hundred years old, with no offspring of his own.  God took him outside, pointed to the vast and ominous heavens filled from one end of the sky to the next with stars, and promised Abraham that his offspring would be as many.  Abraham believed in the Lord.

 

Again in Genesis 17, God established a covenant between Himself, Abraham, and Abraham’s descendants.

 

Genesis 17:7-8

I will establish my covenant as an everlasting covenant between me and you and your descendants after you for the generations to come, to be your God and the God of your descendants after you.  The whole land of Canaan, where you are now an alien, I will give as an everlasting possession to you and your descendants after you; and I will be their God.

 

On Material versus Spiritual Blessing:

 

In the Old Testament, material blessing was a result of God’s favor upon His people and also their obedience.  God’s hand of blessing and favor can be seen from the moment of creation.  He looked at what He had made, and He saw that it was good.  It was pleasing to Him.  He created man in His image, and again, He was pleased.  Then came the fall of man – disobedience - and the divine curse.  This curse not only touched the lives of man, but also that of God’s creation entirely.  It is only because of God’s graciousness and mercy towards man that restoration of relationship could be made.  Still, in order to live under that blessing, there had to be obedience.

 

While we do not live under the Old Testament law today, we can draw much from this example.  In the Old Testament, material blessing was the evidence that signified God’s hand and favor on His people.  Today, while God may bring material blessings our way, the actual blessings a believer receives in return for their obedience, are spiritual.  A blessed life comes from the inside out, not the outside in.  God’s hand and His favor are found most heavily upon those whose lives are fully surrendered and sacrificed to God.  It is not about those things that glitter and shine and please the physical eye, but what shines out from our innermost beings- who we are, not what we have.

 

The Blessedness of Christ:

 

And then, there is the blessing of Christ.  God gave us the gift of His Son, Jesus, which far surpasses any blessing that we could ever imagine.  “Thanks be to God for this indescribable gift!”  The treasure we have in salvation is more than we can fathom.  I know I look for validation of God’s blessing in material things.   I, too, fall into the trap that financial success and wealth are a reflection, or result of, spiritual depth and closeness to God.  Because I don’ t have that, I question whether or not I am living under God’s favor.  Am I missing something?  Yet, looking at God’s word, rediscovering the gift that takes the words right out of my mouth, I realize it has nothing to do with stuff, and everything to do with the blessing of God’s Son.  Because of Jesus, I can be forgiven of my sins and no longer live under a curse.  Because of Jesus, even in suffering I know a peace that passes understanding.  And because of Jesus, I, in turn, can bless others.  There is nothing magical about God’s blessing.  It is simply His grace poured out lavishly upon us.

 

Which brings me to my final thought:  The Cup of Blessing:

 

The ancient Jews had a custom in which they would conclude their meal with a prayer of thanksgiving over a cup of wine – “the cup of blessing”.  In doing so, they acknowledged God as the Giver of all good gifts. 

 

As I have reflected upon this, my thoughts have been drawn to my family.  What cup of blessing am I passing down to my children?  Do they see God’s blessing as superficial as a brand new toy, or lunch out at a fun restaurant?  Or am I teaching them the beauty of God’s blessing from the inside out?  I see this cup of blessing as something that each generation passes down to the next.  My parents, godly and wise, raised me to know God, love God, and see His handiwork in every aspect of our lives.  My husband, as well, was raised in a home where godly principles and instruction were taught and modeled.  From one generation to the next, we pass the cup.  We pass the gift of Jesus down to our children, pray that they will receive this gift, and in turn pass it on to their children.  With the cup of blessing in hand, we are unshakable.  We know who we are.  We know to Whom we belong.  We understand profoundly who provides our daily bread, the roof over our head, the clothes on our backs.  We give thanks to the One who gave us breath and life.  Oh, what a blessing that is!  What a blessed life we have!  All those outward things can fade away, but the gift of Jesus Christ remains forever.  And that, more than riches and wealth, is the inheritance I want to pass on to my children and the generations to follow.  

 

Jesus is the blessing, and the blessing I long to hold on to all of my days.

Posted in Faith | 1 Comment »

“It’s Not About Me”

Feb 22nd, 2010 by Amy

“It’s not about me.”

If I had a quarter for every time I’ve heard that statement – whether from notable church leaders, speakers, bloggers or just super gifted every-day people – I’d be a millionaire.  I caught myself today, as I was praying, saying that very same thing, “Lord, it’s not about me.”  (I, by the way, am not any of those things I just mentioned…just so we’re clear.)

You see, tomorrow morning I will be speaking to our Ladies’ Bible Study.  There are about one hundred or so women in this group.  For me…it might as well be a thousand, a million, or a trillion – you get the picture.  I’m nervous, excited, filled with anticipation and terror.  I believe God has dropped a very meaningful word into my heart to share with these women; however, because the vessel (that would be me) that God has chosen to use is flawed, prideful, insecure, and weak, I have serious doubts that I will be successful in the delivery.

And here is where the rubber meets the road.  As much as I want to be available, real, and obedient to God, regardless of how “well” I do, there is a very real part of me that wants to do a good great job.  I don’t want to get up there and flop, mostly because, well, my human nature kicks in and starts believing that it is about me.  I don’t want to look silly standing up there at the microphone, lose my place in my notes or say, “Um, um, um” one too many times.  To say, “Oh, it’s not about me” is not being completely altruistic.  And I would venture to say that this is a struggle for many people in leadership roles.

There is also a part of me that longs for the affirmation post-speaking.  If I share what the Lord has laid on my heart, that should be enough, right?  Yet here I am wrestling down the flesh in me that wants to flare up and take credit for anything that comes out of my mouth while at the same time not wanting it to be about me.  It’s a battle.

Here’s the thing – I really can’t take any credit for what God has placed on my heart OR the way in which He chooses for me to convey the lesson.  As I have been preparing, every bit of creativity, every deep point, and every “a-ha” moment in the message came directly from God…not my own resources.  This is where I can honestly say, “It’s not about me.”  God is allowing me to utilize certain gifts and abilities in the delivery, but the content?  All that came from Him.  Do I care if I mess up, fumble my words, or realize afterwards that my zipper was down the whole time?  You bet I do!  Why?  Because I’m human.  I’m just a woman full of insecurities and dysfunction.  I’ve got a long way to go.  And maybe someday I won’t measure my success in how well I deliver the message, but if I simply delivered what God asked me to.

I believe true humility is not cowering or walking around slump shouldered, but it is being no more and no less than, the person God created me to be.  So, today I am praying with all my heart that when I get up to speak tomorrow that I will humbly recognize that it is not about me but about Him.  I pray that He will get the glory, even if I don’t.  I pray that my heart will stay in check.  And I’m praying, also, for confidence and peace that I am doing what I was created to do, and love every minute of it.  (And please, Lord, don’t let me trip on the way up to the platform or lose my place in my notes – humility…not humiliation!)

No, it’s not about me.  But it is about Him working through me, and what a marvelous opportunity to get to participate in something like that!

Posted in Faith, Ministry | 5 Comments »

Friday’s Free Advice

Feb 19th, 2010 by Amy

And my Friday’s Free Advice for the day is…(drum roll please)…

 

Pursue your passions!

 

Yikes!  What the heck does that mean?  (Seriously, we could go in several different directions with this.  Especially since I just got home from MomsConnect, and the topic of discussion was “ways to spice up your marriage”.)

 

Allow me to clarify: find out what your God-given passion is, and then pursue it with all of your heart.

 

My first and foremost passion is God: 

 

Deuteronomy 6:5

Love the LORD your God with all your heart (passion) and with all your soul and with all your strength.

 

My second passion is for my husband:

 

Genesis 2:24

A man will leave his father and mother and be united (cleave) to his wife, and they will become one flesh.

 

Thirdly, I am passionate about raising my children to know and love God, each other, and live lives of integrity.

 

Proverbs 22:6

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

 

Beyond these first three priorities in my life, I believe God created me for something very specific.  In fact, I truly believe each and every person on the planet was created and designed for a purpose tailor-made just for them.  God has plans for us, my friends!  That excites me!  Does it excite you?

 

Sometimes the challenge comes, not from whether or not we believe we were created for a purpose, but from not having a clear picture of what that purpose is.  My $.02 for you today?  Do everything you can to uncover and discover all that God has intended for you.  A good place to start is by going through the book SHAPE, by Erik E. Rees.  (I took a class based on this book through my church recently – it was a powerful journey, let me tell you!)

 

Once you have a clear idea of what you are passionate about (and you may already know what that “thing” is but perhaps have been too afraid to declare it or step out and try it) I would encourage you to do two things:

 

  • Find a mentor (someone you trust, respect, admire, and who’s walking a few steps ahead of you in the journey) -  Have them coach you through the process of discovery.

 

  • Look for ways to put your passion to practice. – I’ve said this before, and I’ll say it again, and again, and again (you get the picture); writing is my passion, and that is why I have this silly, little blog.   I am also passionate about working and investing in the lives of other women, thus why I am active in the women’s ministry at our church.  I’m learning to put my passion into practice. 

 

By doing these two things, it is really hard to tell what doors God will open up to you next.  “Do not despise the day of small beginnings,” Zechariah 4:10 (paraphrased).  Where once there was a tiny seed, there will, one day, be a giant oak tree. 

 

Don’t be afraid to step up and out. 

 

Seize your moment…

 

Give God your life…

 

And pursue your passions with all of your heart!

Posted in Fun Stuff, Life | 1 Comment »

Culture Shock

Feb 17th, 2010 by Amy

I’m a mom, and I blog, but I wouldn’t call myself a “mom blogger”.

 

About three years ago, a friend of mine shared a little secret with me.  Her secret?  She had started a blog.  (I vaguely remembered another friend, several years prior to that, telling me the same thing, although I believe she had referred to hers as a website.)  In any case, I did an internal roll of the eyes and tuned her out.  I tried to put on my best listening face, but I’m sure the fuzzy glazed look in my eyes was all too obvious, because my dear friend never brought up her blog again.  Who knew that a few years later I would start my own (maybe my blog should be named “Humbling…me” rather than “Simplifying…me”)? 

 

In any case, one statement that stuck with me from our brief “blogging” conversation was that through her blog she had discovered an entirely new culture of people out there in the web-o-sphere.  Blogging was more than just writing and pasting pictures on a website, but was an actual way of life for multitudes of people – specifically, moms.

 

After doing this blogging thing for almost a year, I’m beginning to see what my friend was talking about: the culture of the mom blogger.  I’ll be very frank here: as much as I enjoy writing and pouring out from both deep and shallow ends of this brain pool, I don’t see myself as a blogger, and I often feel that I am experiencing a type of culture shock. 

 

Growing up in Kenya, I was an American living in Africa.  With as much exposure I had to the culture of that country, I was never a Kenyan.  When we returned to the States, my homeland, I could relate to a small degree with peers my age, but felt like a duck out of water 90% of the time. 

 

When I moved to France, I really wanted to immerse myself in the culture.  I wanted to become as French as I possibly could without becoming weird.  I did well my first six months, diligently working on language skills and French etiquette.  Then, one day I woke up, looked in the mirror at my American frame, tired eyes and greasy hair (I had been asked to refrain from showering every day as it was seen as a waste of water…not kidding here!), and realized I was French-fried.  I’d had it.  I was done with stinky armpits and unmanageable hair.  I was sick and tired of sitting down to dinner at eight or nine o’clock at night, only to spend the following thirty minutes talking about the food rather than eating the food (can we dig in already…I’m starving!).  As much as I wanted to be European chic, it just wasn’t in me.  I came to grips with my American/African/wanna-be-European-ness and decided to be myself: wearing GAP, shaving my legs, and washing my hair every day. 

 

Yet, here I am again, feeling like a duck out of water.  In my pursuit of chasing the blog dream, I have been confronted with the realization that – unlike a large percentage of mom bloggers – I don’t home school; I don’t have 10+ kids (that might be a slight exaggeration, but not too far from the truth); I don’t have a home business; I’m not frugal (although I’m growing in that area); and my internet proficiency goes as far as “cut, paste, e-mail and send”.  I blog to write.  That’s it. 

 

I see the importance of networking, but I find myself unable to relate to all these mom bloggers out there.  (Twitter is going to be my undoing for certain!)  There are groups and lingo, hashtags and conferences and multiple posts uploaded all day long, and I don’t have the time to read, comment, follow, carpool, manage children, cook dinner, do ministry prep, keep a house clean and a hubby contented all at the same time.  I wonder…are these women wearing their computers in a baby sling so that they can tweet every other minute while searching for “hot deals” and recipes online, blog about their lives, while changing diapers, teaching arithmetic and producing Martha Stuart-like snacks to their wee-ones? 

 

Before I burn any bridges and hurt feelings, let me stop right here.  It may seem that these women and I share little to no common ground.  I have three kids, and I feel like I’m managing Noah’s ark.  My children go to school outside the home.  My husband is a pastor, and I feel immensely blessed to partner with him in this calling.  My cooking skills leave much to be desired, but as my hubby puts it, “Hey, I’m not complaining because I didn’t have to make it.  It’s food.  That’s all that counts.”  (Thumbs up to the best and skinniest man in the whole world!)  I abhor doing crafts (too messy for me), and I’m not all that thrifty.  Still, I do believe I share something special with all of the supermom-bloggers out there.  We are kindred in our desire to raise responsible children, to love and support our husbands, pursue our passions, steward our money wisely, and reach out to other moms all over the country/world.  Can we relate 100% with each other?  No.  But in matters of the heart and values that truly count- yes, we can. 

 

This culture shock and my own insecurity might always be there, but at least I can appreciate the beauty around me, just as I learned to do with my life in France.  I lived in France, but I wouldn’t call myself “French”.  I’m a mom, and I blog, but I wouldn’t call myself a “mom blogger”.  However, I am open and willing to learn, grow, and make some new friends in this vast, sub-culture world of the blogging mom.

 

What about you?  Do you blog?  Are you a blogging mom?  Are you fully immersed in the blogging culture?  Or are you like me…standing with one foot in and one foot out?  Feel free to share your thoughts and opinions on the matter.  We may actually have something in common!

Posted in Life, Writing/Blogging | 10 Comments »

Stop And Enjoy The Potty Stops

Feb 15th, 2010 by Amy

Last week I was one twitch away from losing my sanity when, as I was driving to pick Sydney up from school, Brooklyn piped up from behind me, “I need to go potty.”  Which triggered something in Jackson and he echoed her plea, “I need to go potty, too!”  Even with the destination two minutes away, they ruthlessly insisted that they could not hold it…they needed to go “noooowww”.

 

After I scrunched up my mouth, producing what can only be called the “Ugly Mommy Face”, I exhaled loudly and began searching for a feasible pit stop.  Nothing.  We continued driving.  The full bladder cries from the backseat intensified.  I kept driving, stressed out, darting my eyes here and there searching for a McDonald’s or Burger King…anything.  We made it to Sydney’s school parking lot where I parked the car and unloaded my two potty-dancing monkeys in the pouring rain.  They laughed, cheered, and thought this was the best adventure they’d ever had.  I, on the other hand, wanted to get inside the school building and find a bathroom before an “Oops!  Potty-in-the-pants” moment occurred.

 

When we made it back to the car, empty bladders and happy faces with 30 minutes to spare before Sydney would be let out of school, I sat back in my seat and thought further about this little adventure.  Why do I always feel like I’m in a hurry?  Why is my life a constant frenzy of panic and worry that I’m going to miss out on something or be late?  How is it that my children can turn a potty stop into Disney World bliss? 

 

Here’s why.  Children know how to live in a perpetual state of joy.  Every little thing in their lives is a reason for celebration.  Putting pee-pee in the potty, tying shoes, making beds, dressing themselves, cracking the eggs for the cookies we make, picking up their toys, and watching the neighbor walk his dog are all reasons to get down and shake their booties.  I wish I could look at life that way.  I wish I could pay my bills with a smile on my face and thanksgiving in my heart that we have the ability to pay them rather than grumble and grunt my way through.  Or twirl and sing when I’ve successfully folded a mountain of laundry, cooked a homemade meal, and swept the floors.  I think I am sorely deficient in celebrating the little things in life.

 

In the book, “The Life You’ve Always Wanted”, John Ortberg writes:

 

“God is the happiest being in the universe.  We will not understand God until we understand this about him.  God also knows sorrow and grief.  But the sorrow of GOD, like the anger of God, is his temporary response to a fallen world.  The sorrow will be banished forever from his heart on the day the world is set right.  Joy is God’s basic character.  Joy is his eternal destiny.  And God’s intent was that his creation would mirror his joy.”

 

I am challenged to stop hurrying my way through life, and take time to stop and enjoy the potty stops.  With my children as an example, who are experts at celebrating the little things, I want to grant myself permission to relish in the joys of motherhood, pat myself on the back once in a while for cleaning toilets and cooking dinner, and not allow myself to get bent out of shape when I hear “I need to go potty” from the backseat of the car.  Rather, I want to rejoice in the fact that I don’t change diapers anymore (which is cause for celebration for sure).  I want to sing in the rain (with a good, sturdy umbrella) and bask in the rays of pure joy. 

 

We have so much to celebrate – too many blessings to count.  I want to remember that life is a gift; life is about embracing the good and bad as whole, and remembering the One who holds me tightly in His grasp.  I want to be a mirror’s reflection of the One who takes joy in me. 

 

Psalm 28:7

The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in Him, and I am helped.  My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to Him in song.

Posted in Faith, Life, Motherhood | 4 Comments »

Friday’s Free Advice

Feb 12th, 2010 by Amy

Read a book.

 

That’s it.  Read a book. 

 

Oh…perhaps I should be a little more specific. 

 

Read a good piece of fiction. 

 

I like to read.  In fact, I like to read a lot.  Before I was married and had children, I was always reading something.  I wouldn’t classify myself as a bookworm, but I definitely take great pleasure in soaking up great literature.  My life as a mom has limited the scope of my reading.  These days I find myself flipping through the pages of Dr. Dobson’s “Strong-Willed Child” and “Love and Logic Magic for Early Childhood”,  both of which I highly recommend.  And, if my nose isn’t in one of those books, you can easily find me sniffing away through one of several spiritual growth and leadership development books.  Between my job as a mom, my role as a wife, my passion for ministry and deep desire to grow in all three of these areas, by the time my kids are down for the night I don’t have very many active brain cells left.  I’m pretty much tapped out.

 

Last spring I challenged myself to read Tolstoy’s “Anna Karenina”.  I didn’t care how long it took me to read it.  I was determined to plow my way through.  In the past I have felt guilty granting myself permission to read something simply for the fun of it.  I mean, really.  Who has the time?  Then I realized something quite simple.  I have to make the time, and stop feeling guilty about it. 

 

It took me four months to read “Anna Karenina” (even admitting how long it took me to read this book is a tad bit humiliating, to say the least).  There were some days I could only get through about two pages.  My eyes would start criss-crossing and the next thing I knew I was drifting off to “la, la land”.  Still, I tried to read a little bit every day. 

 

For me, thrusting myself into a great story is a form of pampering.  I absolutely love to get caught up in characters and plot, suspense and intrigue, lapping up and chewing on the rich words of the storyteller.  It takes me away, causes me to use my imagination and stretches out the tired muscles in my head. 

 

My advice, read a good fictional piece of literature.  Be good to yourself.  Enjoy thirty minutes of a good story. 

 

I know it can appear unproductive and wasteful, but let me give you something to think about for a minute.  We’re all about balance these days, right?  We work hard to prioritize, juggle, multi-task, etc., in order to attain a semblance of balance.  In my opinion, a balanced life knows how to play too.  It knows how to take care of itself so it doesn’t burn out.  For me, and perhaps for you too, reading something for the pleasure of reading is how I keep a little balance in my life. 

 

I just finished “The Lovely Bones”, by Alice Sebold, and I’m currently looking for my next fictional read.  My goal is to incorporate four fictional pieces of literature into the mixture of other books I am reading through the year.  Maybe you’ve already learned how to strike a balance in this.  I know I tend to be a slow learner.  So, tell me, what books are you reading right now?  Have you read anything good lately?  Is there something you would recommend?  Feel free to share it…I would love to hear your feedback.

 

In the meantime…read on, my friends.

Posted in Books, Fun Stuff | 1 Comment »

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