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Simple, But Not Easy

Aug 3rd, 2010 by Amy

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Trust and obey.

 

If I could sum up what God has been whispering to my heart over the past year, it would be these two simple words: trust and obey.  When I begin to worry about the future, or my children, or finances, or ministry, or the housing market, he gently reminds me to trust and obey.

 

Simple, but not easy.

 

Trust requires me to give up control.  Trust implies that I am not to worry, fret, or concern myself with how everything is going to work out, but to rest in God’s strength.  Trusting God when nothing in the world proves trustworthy.

 

Obedience requires me to step out in faith – to take action regardless of how I feel or what common sense would say.  When the Spirit prompts me to speak, move forward, pause, or hold my tongue, I must obey.  God’s ways are far beyond our ways, far beyond our understanding.  But his ways always have our best interest at heart.

 

A simple “formula” for spiritual growth, but certainly not an easy one.  He doesn’t demand self-sufficiency but complete God-sufficiency.  He doesn’t ask us to figure it out, come up with a plan, or get our ducks in a row.  He doesn’t expect perfection.  He asks us to let go, trust, and follow.

 

To find the very thing we are looking for- the beauty of  life in Christ that we’ve been bumping around in the dark for- we must stop wreckless wandering and start trusting and obeying.  Abandoning ourselves for the glory of God.

 

So, how do we do this?  How do we trust and obey?  How do we step out in this very noble endeavor?  First, we can not do it on our own.  We need God, and we need others.  So relieved am I that I don’t walk this spiritual path alone.  Not only is there a deep intrinsic desire in me for relationship and friendship, but this is also God’s desire for me.  None of us were intended to live our lives as lone rangers.  We were created for fellowship.  On my own, I will spend a lifetime striving to trust and obey.  And on my own, I will fail.  However, when I find myself facing a challenge, requiring more of me than I can give, that is when I call out to God, and I call on a friend.  No matter what situation demands my trust and obedience, I can overcome through God’s strength and the strength he pours out through a fellow believer.

 

With the support of a friend or friends, I receive the direction given to me by the Holy Spirit, and I am empowered to trust and obey.  It’s not about willpower but the will to allow God’s power to work in my life and through the life of The Body of Christ.

 

Is this an easy answer?  Probably not, but spiritual growth is not easy.  Spiritual growth hurts.  Just as the body endures the pains of growth, so do our spirits when God is pressing in to us and drawing us to a deeper relationship.  Reaching out to people, too, requires trust.  And for some that is too high a risk.  At some point in our lives, however, we have to make a conscious decision to reach out and take that risk.  Otherwise, we will stay the same forever, repeating behaviors, feeling frustrated and disappointed with God, and ultimately feeling the weight of failure on our shoulders because we just can’t seem to figure out how to get beyond this place.

 

Simple, but not easy.

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Posted in Faith, Life, Ministry | 3 Comments »

Know When To Hold ‘Em…Know When To Fold ‘Em

Jul 29th, 2010 by Amy

Almost four years ago I had a vision.  Not a spooky, smoke in the sky, angelic manifestation.  It was more along the lines of a God-inspired dream to start a mom’s group at our church.  It would be a no frills, sit and enjoy coffee while the kids run around and play, kind of group.  No agenda, no expectation, simply come as you are.  As I dreamed and prayed, I envisioned this group growing and expanding into somewhat of a book club/close-knit/monthly girls’ night out circle of friends.     

 

A year later (June 2007) we kicked-off the group with a bang.  By September it almost seemed the dream was a bust.  I blogged a bit about the ups and downs of starting this ministry last summer.  There were many growing pains, to say the least. 

 

Three years after pouring blood, sweat, and tears into something very near and dear to my heart, I sensed, once again, God speaking to me.  He wasn’t guiding me to reinvent the group, or invigorating  me with fresh, new vision.  This time he was asking me to let it go. 

 

At first I wasn’t ready to receive that direction.  I prayed about it for months…MONTHS!  Deep, deep down I knew God was redirecting my focus, and the moms group was not going to be a part of this new season in my life.  However, I’m very tenacious, and I wasn’t ready to let go until I witnessed the fulfillment of my vision.

 

Never have Kenny Roger’s words from “The Gambler” rung more true: You got to know when to hold ‘em…know when to fold ‘em.  Know when to walk away…know when to run…

 

While I don’t take deep spiritual guidance from Kenny Rogers, or equate ministry to gambling, I would have to say that he isn’t too far from reality on this one.  Trusting God, and stepping out in a new ministry can be somewhat of a gamble.  We don’t know what the final outcome will be, and there is no guarantee that we will see a fair amount of success.  There will be seasons when we must “hold ‘em” and seasons when we must “fold ‘em”.  It was becoming more and more clear to me that it was time to “fold” the moms group.

 

I stepped down from leading MomsConnect in June.  My co-leader sensed God was changing directions in her life as well, and she too stepped down.  It ends without fanfare, without a lot of noise, and without a spotlight.  It ends in much the same way it began…quietly and anonymously. 

 

As I look at the life of MomsConnect I have seen the ebb and flow of a group that was never meant to be exclusive.  Initially I envisioned a large group of women, connecting and engaging life with one another.  But here is the reality: MomsConnect has served and reached a countless number of women, just not at the same time.  As families have moved away, moms have returned to work, or new life seasons have pulled women in new directions, MomsConnect has evolved too.  In my finite vision I saw these individuals collectively.  In God’s vision he saw them individually.  Coming and going…MomsConnect being the place where they found community during a specific season of time.

 

Ministry success is oftentimes measured by numbers.  If the numbers are high, then the ministry is succeeding.  If the numbers are dropping, or low, then the ministry is “suffering”.  Unless MomsConnect hit a high note and stayed there, I figured everything I put my heart into was failure.  However, God has shown me through this journey of letting go, it has been my obedience, and not the final outcome of the group, that deems it successful.  I may have been imperfect in my delivery and leadership, but I didn’t fail God.

 

If Kenny’s words still don’t cut it for you, perhaps something a little more spiritual, like the Bible, will help convince you:

 

Ecclesiastes 3:1 & 14

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven.  I know that everything God does will endure forever; nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it.  God does it so that men will revere him.”

 

Letting go of a dream can be difficult, but we have to remember who’s dream it was in the first place.  If we are trusting God, and walking in obedience to the calling he has placed on our lives, then we can rest assured that our sacrifices have eternal value.  If it is a season of holding on, then hold on.  If it is a season to fold, then fold.  Either way, it all belongs to God, and there is nothing that can add or take away from the work he is doing in our lives.

Posted in Ministry | 3 Comments »

On The Lips!

Jul 26th, 2010 by Amy

Sitting at my aunt’s dining room table, enjoying the company of family and good food, we were suddenly jolted from our adult conversation by shrieks and squeals coming from above.  Five little second cousins, and one baby cousin who was trying to take a power nap, were getting their wild things on.  We heard a lot of giggling, a few thuds here and there, and several unidentified sounds.  The baby’s mom came to his rescue and reported to the rest of us what she witnessed amongst the chaos.  There was one little girl cousin puckering up her lips, one little boy cousin awaiting his doom, while three little girl cousins jumped wildly on an air mattress chanting, “On the lips! On the lips!”  Before Sydney could plant a nice, big smooch on her poor cousin James’ cheek, the grown ups intervened, capturing the whole thing on video.  (Lord, have mercy!)

We are a close family, but…well…not that close.

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All silliness aside, it was truly amazing to me how quickly my children bonded with my cousins’ children.  James and Sydney were babies the last time we were together, and since that time, we’ve added a few family members.  Without skipping a beat, our children fell in love (not the romantic kind of love) instantaneously.  They played their hearts out every day in the ocean’s waves and couldn’t wait to see each other the next day.  For almost two weeks, they were inseperable.

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Saying goodbye was emotional and bittersweet.  Buckets of tears were shed by all the little ones (and the big ones too…saying goodbye is hard no matter how old you are).  I hate parting ways with those I dearly love, but I am grateful that when we go our separate ways, there is a deep longing in all of us for the next time we will see each other again.  And I am grateful that we have inadvertantly passed that down to our children.

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James was Sydney’s first real crush.  They bonded – on their boogie boards, riding waves, and sharing his goggles – the stuff that real romance is made of.  This summer will hold a fond memory for both of them, and as they grow older, they will realize how blessed they are to be family.

When I start to feel the twinge of sadness that missing my family brings, I only have to remember, “On the lips!  On the lips!” and a smile is quick to cross my face.  As my cousin’s wife remarked, “There are places in the south where marrying a second cousin is perfectly normal…but we are not from those parts.”

Amen to that.

Posted in From The Mouth Of Babes, Fun Stuff, Life, Random | 3 Comments »

Sand

Jul 23rd, 2010 by Amy

Photo taken by Janette Hubbard Johanson

Photo taken by Janette Hubbard Johanson

As I anticipated my return home from vacation I could feel the creative juices swooshing in my head.  Sitting still while the waves of the Atlantic crashed at my feet, new insights poured into my mind like the ocean water filling every sandy nook and cranny of the warm, dry beach where I perched like a hungry seagull.  I have often said that I find myself again when I am at the beach.  Salty air, sunshine, time with family, piles of shells collected in a make-shift bucket,  and the sound of the ocean faithfully restore clarity and peace of mind.

Sydney asked me what sand is made of.  I explained to her that sand is simply rock, shells, and coral that have been crushed into tiny pieces by pounding waves.  This process takes years and years and years.  The constant jostling and ripping from the weight of ruthless waters breaks apart these hard objects  and turns them into the soft sand we love to sink our toes into.

I’m home now, but my heart is still processing the simple lessons of the sea.

Are we not all a little bit like the tiny grains of sand on the ocean floor?  We get knocked down and crushed by the relentless waves of hurt, personal pain, and fear.   Shame and condemnation break us to pieces and leave us scattered along the beaches of life.

And then God comes in.  God restores.  God makes something beautiful out of our sharp edges and disfigured forms.  He offers grace where once we were pounded with condemnation.  He ministers mercy where once we were hammered with judgment.  He softens our hearts through the pain…through every wave that threatens to destroy.

Grace has brought me back to my little spot on the sand with the hot sun kissing my shoulders and the foamy broken waves tickling my feet.  Grace has washed over the condemnation, and grace has set me free.  Grace is softening my hard corners and smoothing out my rough edges.

Posted in Faith, Grace, Ministry | 2 Comments »

Back In The Saddle Again

Jul 19th, 2010 by Amy

We made it home.  Always a miracle, to say the least.  Aside from one suitcase and one car seat still MIA, six flight delays, one missed flight, a water spill, one potty accident, and finally making it home at one in the morning, all five Slater bodies are well and accounted for.

 

The last words out of my mouth as our weary, travelling heads hit the pillows this morning were, “Dear God, please don’t let the kids get up before 10am!” 

 

They were up at 6:30.

 

I’ve spent the first three hours of my first morning home paying bills, going through hundreds of e-mails, digging through our cupboards and fridge for breakfast foods that are still edible after two weeks away, and chugging down coffee like water. 

 

My suitcase is still packed.  Can I just head to the airport and hop on the first plane back to North Carolina?  I called my mom this morning, and they were at the beach.  Post vacation depression has officially set in.  All five of us have shed rivers of tears.  I miss my family back East, Sydney is mourning the end of her first summer crush, and wouldn’t you know it…Portland is gray and drizzly.  Really.  Can I please get back on a plane now?  I’m not kidding.

 

Vacation is over.  That’s the reality.  I’m slowly working my way back into the saddle again.  Being away, and being unplugged, gave me thousands of minutes to think, process, and reevaluate my life.  Walks on the beach, conversations with my family, and much empty time has given me a fresh perspective that I believe I lacked before.  My core values have not changed, but there are changes to the way I live them out that I want to make. 

 

One of the changes will be to unplug more frequently.  Amazingly, I had no withdrawals or negative side effects from little internet access.  On the contrary, I found myself liberated and peaceful.  I need more of that. 

 

And so, I’m going to wrap up my first post-vacation blog post, and get to work on unpacking my suitcase.  There’s a high probability that tears will be shed in the process.   If you think about it…pray for me! :)

 

And have no fear…I’ve got a lot of stuff in this head of mine to share with you!  Little by little, it will all leak out.

Posted in Life, Random | 4 Comments »

Unplugging…Temporarily

Jul 3rd, 2010 by Amy

To my dear friends and readers…

 

I’m about to embark on a long anticipated vacation.  I’ll be beachin’ it for two weeks with my family: the “Slater 5″, parents, sister, aunts, uncles, cousins, etc.

 

I. can. not. wait.

 

There will be lots of reading, sleeping, coffee drinking, coffee talking, beach walking, ocean diving, and seafood eating.  There will not be much of anything else: house cleaning, laundry doing, dinner cooking, e-mail corresponding, tweeting, or blogging.  We’re unplugging for two weeks and, while little to no internet access makes me a tad bit nervous, I’m anticipating a very relaxing get-away.

 

I’m sure two weeks will give me plenty of new material to share with you when I return home.  (Flying across the country with three little people.  Lord, have mercy!)

 

Until then, this is where I’ll be…

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Posted in Life, Writing/Blogging | 2 Comments »

Friday’s Free Advice – Listen To Mom

Jul 2nd, 2010 by Amy

I was two seconds away from hitting delete and completely doing away with my blog this week.  Then, my dear husband sent me this article written by Michael Hyatt, CEO of Thomas Nelson Publishing.  I read it.  It was timely.  I needed a good reminder that, sometimes, I have to go back to the reason and purpose I started blogging and forget all the other stuff.  I decided to keep the blog.

 

I started working on my “Friday’s Free Advice” today, got five hundred words into it, and stopped.  I called my mom, had a long talk about what’s been bumming me out recently, read what I had written out loud to her, and then I deleted the entire draft.  “Too self-deprecating,” was her observation.  She went on to encourage me that I can’t forget the purpose for which I started my blog and allow these small seasons to develop the gifts and passions that God has given to me.

 

My mom was right.

 

I was getting a little side-tracked by a negative response I received from someone I don’t even know a few weeks ago.  It was passive-aggressive in nature and really hurt.  (This just goes to show that I haven’t quite developed a tough skin yet, which I’m sure takes time.)  Instead of writing from a position of conviction, I was beginning to second-guess every word I typed.  Shame.

 

So, today I am starting over.  Today is a brand new day…with no mistakes in it yet.  Today I am going to dish out the best advice I can muster up.  Today I am going to give you “Amy” in all her…um…glory?  (Glory is probably stretching it a bit, but I’ll just go with it for now.)

 

Today’s Friday’s Free Advice: Listen to mom.  She’s usually right.  (And Michael Hyatt.  He’s got good things to say, too.)

 

If you are feeling discouraged or frustrated about something near and dear to your heart - parenting, marriage, ministry, career, writing, blogging…whatever it may be – go back to the beginning.  Search your heart and remember why you started out on this journey in the first place.  Rediscover the dream.  Realize that, while you may not be where you want to be right now, you are closer today than you were yesterday.  We all have so far to go, and it’s easy to get discouraged or side tracked, but the hope we have is that God isn’t finished with us yet.  There’s more to your story…and this is only the beginning.

Posted in Life, Writing/Blogging | 1 Comment »

Freedom

Jun 30th, 2010 by Amy

I can’t really claim to be an expert of sorts.  I’m not a theologian.  I’m not a parenting guru.  Until recently, I’ve managed to kill all plant life in my keep – no kidding.  (I’m just thrilled that tiny green strawberry buds are peeking out from our little garden this year.  This…this…is a miracle.)  I’m not known for my cooking skills, and I’m a newbie frugalista.  All in all, I’m not that impressive.

 

However, I do have a few thoughts now and then, and today I’m thinking about freedom.

 

What kind of freedom?

 

Not freedom to go “girls gone wild” on the world.  I’m not endorsing irresponsibility.  Not Fourth of July and fireworks displays (although highly entertaining and lovely).  And not the “Free Love” hippie movement of the 60’s.  The freedom I’m talking about is freedom in Christ.  Freedom to live out my life in the way that God created and designed for me to live.  Freedom to love.

 

I Corinthians 10:23-32

“Everything is permissible” – but not everything is beneficial.  ”Everything is permissible” – but not everything is constructive. Nobody should seek his own good, but the good of others.  Eat everything sold in the meat market without raising questions of conscience, for, “The earth is the Lord’s, and everything in it.”  If some unbeliever invites you to a meal and you want to go, eat whatever is put before you without raising questions of conscience.  But if anyone says to you, “This has been offered in sacrifice,” then do not eat it, both for the sake of the man who told you and for conscience’ sake – the other man’s conscience, I mean, not yours.  For why should my freedom be judged by another’s conscience?  If I take part in the meal with thankfulness, why am I denounced because of something I thank God for?  So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.  Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God.

 

What this means to me is that I choose to do certain things and abstain from certain things, not because I am afraid that God will smite me dead for being ungodly, but for the benefit of my brothers and sisters.  Other’s salvation and well-being should be more important to me than what I do or don’t do.  And I deeply long to live this out with a sweet spirit.  God has given us freedom, and if we embrace it fully, we may become the most irresistible people on the planet.

 

There is no room for selfishness in this kind of freedom.  This is what makes following Christ so challenging, not all the rules and regulations that seem to bubble up when people hear the word “Christianity”.  Following Christ means we lay down our own rights for the rights of others.  Treating our neighbors, our friends, our families, our enemies, the way in which we want to be treated.  That’s some tough stuff when you get down to it.  It means I don’t live for myself, but I live to love and serve others.  And it is only by the grace of God that I can do this at all.

 

Fear tells us that we don’t need God, because God will only tie us down and make us miserable.  “Needing” God is weakness, and we don’t want to be weak.  So, we wrap up in thick layers of self-sufficiency.

 

Fear tells us that the only way to stay on God’s good side is to follow a man-made mandate on how to live a life pleasing to God.  If you step outside of this moral code you are being selfish and worldly.  So, we envelop ourselves in belief systems that give us do’s and don’ts that promise to ensure our eternal security.  (Galatians 5:4 “You who are trying to be justified by law have been alienated from Christ; you have fallen away from grace.”) This type of “Christianity”, by the way, is the very thing that turns so many unbelievers off to God.

 

Fear breeds extremes – one direction or another – and neither extreme does anyone any good.  However, freedom – true freedom - produces a fruit that even the most hardened sceptic can’t ignore.  Galatians 5:22 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness and self-control.”

  

True holy living, I believe, is clinging completely to Jesus.  Holding him close and allowing him access to hold us closely to his character.  Holy living is walking in the freedom and beauty of God’s most precious law: the law of love.  If we could only capture in our hearts and minds what this really, really means, there would be no doubt that following Christ is the only satisfying way to live.

 

“How little people know who think that holiness is dull.  When one meets the real thing…it is irresistable.  If even 10% of the world’s population had it, would not the whole world be converted and happy before a year’s end?” – C.S. Lewis

 

I want to be irresistable.  I want to be the real thing.  I want to take the freedom that God has given to me, by grace, and walk in it with a sober awareness that this freedom to love is the same freedom that will lead others to Christ.

Posted in Faith, Grace, Ministry | 2 Comments »

Four In A Row

Jun 28th, 2010 by Amy

We’ve had four days in a row of sunshine, blue skies, and heat.  Pinch me.  I think I must be dreaming.  I don’t want to get my hopes up too high, but summer, quite possibly, has made its entrance out here in the Northwest.  I’m afraid to visit weather dot com for fear that rain will be in the 10 day forecast.  I’d rather live in ignorance and believe that warm days are here for the long haul.

 

I’m in a skipping, jumping, life-is-wonderful kind of mood too!  Sunshine is good for the soul.  It burns off the dark, cloudy days and turns the doldrums into a far, distant memory.  Yes.  I’m high on vitamin D this morning.  Can’t you tell?

 

In honor of our four days in a row of beautiful, sunny, summertime kind of weather, I quickly jotted down a few of my favorite summertime must-haves.  Feel free to add any of your own summer favorites to my list too.

 

Summer is…

  • Sunshine
  • Swimming
  • Sunscreen SPF 50 (or more appropriately, Sun-paste – that stuff really works!)
  • Strawberry Shortcake
  • Sleeping in
  • Starbucks Frappuccinos
  • Sundresses and flip flops
  • Sitting outside under the shade of a tree
  • Summer reads
  • Salads with fresh fruits and veggies

 

Have I forgotten anything?

 

Because I don’t want to miss out on any bit of this very beautiful day, I’m going to wrap this up and get off of my computer.  The tree outside my window, reflecting gold and yellow beams of sunlight from its leaves, keeps beckoning me to come outside and play.

 

And so…I’m off to soak in another beautiful summer day!

 

Psalm 118:24

This is the day the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it!

Posted in Fun Stuff, Life, Random | 3 Comments »

Friday’s Free Advice – Oops…I Did It Again!

Jun 25th, 2010 by Amy

I’ve had better weeks.  This was definitely not one of them.

 

I make mistakes.  In fact, I make a lot of mistakes.  If I were to think too long and hard on all the mistakes I’ve made this past week alone, I’m afraid I’d end up drowning in defeat.  I’ve made big ones and little ones.  Some of them I didn’t even realize were blunders until, upon further introspection, realized that I messed up bad.

 

I hate that I make mistakes.  I so desperately want to make the right decisions, think with a sound mind, and operate my home with sweetness and grace.  Sadly, I can’t keep up with my good intentions.  No sooner am I infused with a fresh “can do” attitude, then I’m slapped back a few steps with “what were you thinking?  What a mistake!”

 

Please tell me I’m not the only one who struggles with this!

 

Since I’m pretty certain that I am not alone when it comes to mistake making, I’m going to share with you how I deal with my mishaps and blunders.  Today’s Friday’s Free Advice: The common cure for the common mistake – forgiveness.

 

First, acknowledge that you’ve made a mistake.  Conviction – not shame – tugs at our hearts when we’ve acted out of our selfish nature and not the nature of God.  Accepting the conviction and realizing that we’ve done something wrong is the first step to overcoming.

 

Second, confess it.  Tell God what’s going on.  Get it out.  Be real.  You don’t need an M.Div. to tell God what you’re feeling or what you’re struggling with.  In your own words, tell God what’s happening.

 

Third, ask for forgiveness.  Once you’ve unburdened your heart with the junk going on inside of you, simply ask God to forgive.  He will.  Immediately.

 

And finally, let it go.

 

Psalm 130-11-13

For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his love for those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us.  As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him.

 

 

I’ve had to do this a lot this week.  Thankfully, God’s grace transcends my humanity.  He knows my heart; he knows the intent is pure, but the vessel is broken.  He forgives and allows me the freedom to get up and try – over and over and over – again.

 

Happy Friday…make the most of your day…and don’t let your mistakes hold you back from walking in the freedom God has for you!

Posted in Faith, Grace, Life | 3 Comments »

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